You Decide

You Decide

If you're managing your obligations, what is necessary (the things you earned via hard work) for you is only up to you to decide. Try having a disability and a few business streams, then tell me how un-necessary it is to invest in self-care hacks to keep one's body/mind at peak? 

It's math, if you run multiple lanes with a disability which can often be a part-to-full-time job: set survival constraints and guard your time even closer: you will not be able to do everything or know everyone - schedule limits are nothing to apologize for, it is what it is.

Strict adherence to insomnia buffers and recharge time has been a game-changer for my ADHD - it's a daily disability that does not magically go away and so healthy love and care isn't measured via exceptions to boundaries (limits are to be respected, not destroyed), that's not how it is to be shown.

✨✨✨If someone chooses to make a boundary of yours mean anything about themselves or about your measure of dedication to something, that's their own problem and issue. You're not to overexert yourself to prove anything to anyone. Grown and mature adults do not take privacy limits personally.✨✨✨

Caring is wanting people to be healthy and happy, even if that means being less or un-available (as long as people handle their obligations), all else is wanting something from them as otherwise boundaries are respected, as are personal privacy zones (mentally and otherwise).

Remove if possible:
• Anyone who thinks you need to over-play your part/beg to receive reciprocity;
• Anyone who sees your health needs as a problem;
• Anyone who sees boundaries or the word "no" as an argument (the "power-over" type controllers).

Anyone who expects you to shoulder more than your fair share is encouraging irresponsibility towards your own duties. That's not someone who genuinely cares about you; they're a taker. Moreover, such individuals may retaliate against your boundaries or accuse you of having an attitude or being too weak to handle more, that's fine. That is the price you have to pay for having a backbone around unhealthy limit-disrespecting connections and situations, whatever, let them be who they are. However, this doesn't imply you should dismantle your defences; keep those boundaries firmly in place.

Let the trash take itself out.


Anyone who comes into your life just for taking and adding to your load like fake friends who want to add things that resemble work to your time off (not alleviate it) is going to be offended by boundaries. For the fake newcomers, if they're already offended and they don't even know you well, can you imagine the chaos they would've added to your life I do allow them to come in? Having something does not mean you have time to go back-and-forth with people who are simply adding stress to your life and there to take take take... and it doesn't mean that you owe them anything if it takes you away from core priorities and life's obligations, they can literally find someone who has the spare time instead of bothering you.

Proximity warrant not trust or access to someone's resources or time, humanity respects autonomy and choice, I do not tolerate leeches.

Entitled people are too much trouble to deal with, so it is best to not deal with them in the first place if they can be avoided. 

Humanity doesn't mean being available to just anyone and kindness should not be at the expense of your own time to recharge. Guarding what is under your ownership (as Oneness doesn't mean having no boundaries, humanity respects autonomy). Guarding what belongs to you is your right and doesn't deny anyone of theirs as they do not own your time, energy, and dpace: you do. 

Handling your responsibilities first is being an adult and avoiding going into time-debt. Only those looking to use you will have an issue with this basic fact.

Rest is a requirement whether or not you have a disability, right? You need more if you have a disability though, so having to schedule "buffers" in your day to catch up on sleep and in your week means you don't have spare time. Anyone who doesn't understand this isn't for you.

You cannot cut into rest or sleep, so everything must work around that (your basic survival and functioning) unless it is from your own household. Health is your line of defence. We are able to offer results (what flexibility enables long-term) and show our passion in our own way, we do not show up in the same manner or by the same means: that's what functioning differently means, and no apologies are to be made here, it's up for acceptance not debate. 


The people who call self-love selfish have it twisted because you're not the one trying to make other people responsible for your needs and household at the expense of their own, those people are trying to find someone to use. You are managing your own responsibilities first.

Those who want you to put their vision ahead of your own would not do the same for you either and that is not even logical either way.

Seriously, everyone should carry their own load, and if you're going to partake in someone else's vision: it must uplift both at the same time because why should you delay your own goals? Helping others achieve their own goals through the business you're actually in is what makes sense, not through a business you're not even in at the expense of the one that you're in. 

You have a purpose on this planet and it's not some random people who think that self-care is selfish that are going to deter that.

You have the power to determine how you handle your overflow, not them.

The guidebook to success is what is inside your heart, not with some guru says or thinks because most of these people have a course to sell or an agenda. 

Why would you want to run on empty and burn yourself out? I don't think that any vision or success arises from a hospital bed, that doesn't make any sense. You don't have the capacity to work if you don't have health first.

You need to guard the buffers of rest that you have in your schedule, and unless it is your household or a dependent, know that no obligation exists, and that it's entirely your choice how you manage your overflow.

I have designated blocks of time for resting and blocks of time in my schedule for putting order in my thoughts in addition to spaces in my life where nothing that resembles work is allowed at all.

Of all people, I would expect my friends not to be sources of unnecessary work, so I don't tolerate people in my life who are trying to latch onto me for their own benefit at my own expense because why set your own household on fire for someone else's? That's not even biblical or logical on any planet.

You have the authority to determine how to manifest your true self, manage your time, energy, personal health, and space.

Prioritize your survival and well-being, especially if you have a disability. You have the freedom to allocate your excess resources and select which charities to support.

Love for your craft shouldn't compel you to work without compensation, add random projects to your plate that do not fit your actual objectives, or think about your business during time that should be allocated towards recharging; that's illogical.

I simply don't do anything that resembles work during designated resting hours, and my limited working hours for my brand are allocated to things that move the needle. Things that have staying power rather than doing things just for the sake of it is what wins. 

I wouldn't turn my gym time into filming time, but I would get influencers to do that for my brand on my behalf on their own time (for commission pay), for instance, because that protects my recharge time.

This is what I mean by you get to decide how you manage your stuff so that you protect your precious time to rest because your survival and your full cup precedes your ability to function and survive and manage your own household first. You don't have to set yourself on fire for anybody who's worthy of you.

You don't need to compromise your self-care, goals, survival recharge time, or vision for people who belong in your life. This isn't for optimal living, it's for basic functioning with or without a disability. This is why only needle-moving business items need to exist. Wisdom.

The right individuals would never demand you to sacrifice your well-being because it's illogical and you deserve love for simply being yourself.

Those who suggest it's selfish to prioritize yourself (while not being your dependents) are the ones being selfish by expecting you to exhaust yourself for their sake (they to drain you and infringe on your basic self-care and rest - the red zone so that they can take from you).

They want to intrude on your recharge time and want you to sacrifice yourself/your own purpose for their taking which they would not do for you even if they will try to convince you that putting their vision ahead of your own is the key to success, no, being the main character of your life is the key to joy which respects your time and then inspired action towards genuine success will follow.

I am even more careful with rest and work time as the mental focus circuit doesn't recover from needless interruptions aka anything that isn't a dependent or 911-level. I care about humanity, but only will I ever pour from overflow and I will not delay my own purpose in the process. 

I do not go into the red zone as I am responsible for my wellness and maintaining my ability to provide for my household and my fundraiser (which is more than the leeches out there do, yet they whine the most about people with boundaries which is ironic).

Protecting your energy and resources isn't taking from anyone, harming them, or wishing harm on them; it's simply being responsible for your own needs like a grown adult being a good steward of what is under their responsibility and ownership (which are your responsibilities that you are owning, you're not the one trying to dump your responsibilities on others).

Humanity is about doing no harm, it's not about codependency and acting like people are extensions of whatever agenda/request is thrown at them by random people.

Wisdom, self-trust, and on fleek instincts are worth more than opinions because you may be proven right when facing an unduly adverse reaction to normal healthy boundaries and be glad you never allowed certain people in your life to any extent.

You have no inherent obligation to those who aren't your dependents (outside of what you're able to do with your overflow if you even have overflow or time), and anyone who tries to manipulate you into being used is the one acting selfishly. 💯

Your boundaries are your responsibility so anyone else's issue with how you protect your peace (which harms no one and preserves your household) is a "them" problem. Taking offense to the boundaries of others that you do not even know (and do not own) is a personal problem. 

Those who cannot comprehend the concept that some people need more more privacy than others or are different than others and require more personal space/private time unbothered to manage their health/prefer to be careful who they let into their lives: that's a them problem.

Consideration is merely not being rude back, it doesn't mean acquiescing or engaging when you prefer not to or do not have the energy to be delayed at a clearly busy moment in your day (but such people do not care about your time, they just want something... their entitlement is delusional as they do not know you and they do not deserve to know you).

I would not even allow intrusive and very orchestrated (ambushing type) people in my life if I had spare time to begin with.

You're not inadequate because your boundaries are different because not everyone is a stakeholder in your life. If you're not infringing on anyone's rights and simply preserving the little peace you have between multiple commitments, you do you and guard your time off.

"Do not disturb" segments are critical the busier you are and it will only be those looking to make
demands on your time who are mad they can't benefit off your energy or time, which is not a loss for you but a gain. As long as your obligations are met, protect your peace. 

Mental recharge time (alignment with Source) matters more than any "opportunity" as abundance is the truth. I am not interested in scattering my energy for the sake of not missing out because it's not possible to miss out on what's meant for me while I respect my health first and not showing up "mentally present" destroys focus for ADHD.

 In my "villain" era where I choose my health, my peace, my sanity over anyone outside my household or dependents who has anything to say about my sacred mental health and insomnia buffer-preserving boundaries. I offer snacks for the road because at least I am a nice villain. 

Humanity begins with autonomy over what you own (your space, your personal time, your mind), so while grace is needed within reason, ask yourself why you'd worry about what anyone who has attempted to override your free will blatantly thinks of you? Lines don't offend grown ups. Consideration doesn't mean caving in, it means not being rude back.  

Guaranteed, unbothered, cemented, and heavily guarded (as it should be) balance whose existence I need not worry from one day to the next looks fabulous on me if I do say so myself. Obstructions not stemming from my own household or dependents can stay out. I repel all of it. 🛡️ 

Your boundaries are not the issue, but the people who choose to make an issue out of your boundaries are the ones who may benefit from seeking help perhaps.

A clear scope for my business means I don't have anything to worry about outside of those hours even if I tried.

I'm not going to punish my efficiency by taking on unnecessary deals either, I earned this ability to scale back.

Putting your health first means being unapologetic about being true to yourself and doing what's best for you. Honouring yourself is your personal responsibility towards your obligations first, the right people will encourage your wellness, remember that.

Refusing to deplete yourself, filling your cup first and being responsible for your obligations first means spending your overflow wisely and by choice. Boundaries protect health. Boundaries aren't tearing anyone them down, taking from,
or bothering anyone: they preserve you. ✨✨

Why would a genuine “good person” think they’re above your oxygen mask?

Paying back sleep-debt daily via flexible hours is how I avoid a breaking point, which is fabulous. 🔋 There's no way that can happen when there are insomnia buffers and only mission-critical things get filtered in. 💯