Self-Love & Personal Power (Never Let Them Change You)

Being yourself repels the wrong people and places, it directs you to the right places, people, friendships and opportunities. It opens up the doors to new adventures and ways of life.

Being yourself can be difficult sometimes, especially if you have ever been bullied and then gaslighted for bringing the issue of how you were being treated to light.

Being told that your problem with their behavior was the problem, rather than the poor treatment itself is gaslighting. Having a solution-oriented response is good; however, being told that you having an issue with bad treatment is the root of the problem itself is not right. The creation and existence of the problem/the work required in solving it was the poor treatment and their chosen unkind and unethical behaviour at your expense, not your reaction to it or the fact that you brought it to light (in case this happens or has happened to you).

Do not let any manipulative person convince you that you are worth less and that your standards are too high. Do not settle for crumbs.

You are not supposed to sit there and be happy and roll over when someone walks on you or tries to pull the wool over your eyes as to what is really going on. It is fairly normal to have a problem with being belittled. I do not believe that anyone who expects you to put up and shut up has your best interests in mind, at all. If you are not being supported, you are being used or being groomed to be used.

You can have a positive attitude and still have a problem with poor treatment!

Yes, be solution-oriented and positive in any situation; however, do not tolerate nonsense.

It is hard to be yourself if you were ever ganged up on for personal traits or wanting to better yourself. It can be even harder to shake those feelings of self-doubt and comparison. If you were ever bullied for not fitting in or being different, be it due to an accent, weight, age, gender, race, orientation, or any other trait, I am sure you can relate. 

Another possible cause of bullying is that they want you to do good, but not better than them. In hindsight, so it makes sense that I was hated on for trying to better myself and my health at some point by a group of people.

I am sharing this because other people who are about positive vibes can probably relate! Misery loves company, by being you, you essentially block out that noise. 

The right people will love you and your strength. The people who do not have to bring others down in order to feel good about themselves or in order to gain power have issues, they had insecurities long before you showed up.

I share this because I know many people get bullied in high school, even in University, College, and in some workplaces.

Part of how I want to use my platform is to help people to be themselves and switch their mindset away from revenge and victim-mode and onto 'let go and let karma' as well as 'keep being yourself,' despite what they did and said to you.

Have you ever triggered people for being good at what you do? I have and if you can relate... Because they were mad at the fact that you were more competent than them, rather than working hard to refine their own skills and because you triggered them - they tried to take your Spirit and Crown, so to speak.

A hater's goal is to distract you from your goals and make other people hate you, even if they may succeed at making others dislike you, do not change yourself.

Do not let them take your energy and drive and the very ambition they hated you for.

Do not let them control how you feel about yourself. 

In any case, you only get that negative reaction from people who do not want to better themselves and want results without putting in the work. 

Remember:

There is nothing wrong with you and the traits you were bullied for. Never re-arrange yourself just because someone or a petty group of childish people had an issue with it, as long as you are harming no one in the process, live your life. 

Sure, work on your flaws, but you have a right to peacefully exist without their un-warranted repeat sneak attacks. 

Taking your self-hatred out on other people who reflect what you lack or hi-light your short-comings by speaking up makes you a weak person. 

They have no jurisdiction over your personality or personal time/how it is spent (these seem to be the most common points of attack of a hater).

Be yourself, why? Because their insults were a reflection of how they feel about themselves and their relationship with themselves. After all, their bullying behavior was a reflection of a war, the one they have with themselves. Your life is in your hands from this moment forward. Take as long as you need to heal, but please do not internalize their treatment as a statement of your worthiness.

Do not let them take away the purpose for your life and your essence (life force and soul). Perhaps part of your mission can be inspiring others with your experiences? 

Genuine people will flock to you. That is all you need.

Strong and confident people are not threatened by others. Instead of making yourself smaller and less intimidating, go towards people who are as strong as you are and deserving of your time.

The sad people who have to gang up to bring you down, did they really win if they pushed out the threat? 

The sad people who judge how highly driven people spend their time, do they have more of a life than you if they spend their time watching you? Would such people not have more success in life if they put their energy into building something positive of their own?

The same way that sexual assault and harassment are about power and not attraction, bullying is about taking someone's personal power - not because said person is weak - because your power scares them.

You are meant to inspire the right people, not shrink back to make people with low self-esteem more comfortable.

My favourite insult has to be that I am too passionate and too emotional about my craft, it is usually spewed by people with no pride in what they do but my client satisfaction rate is extremely high. I am sharing this to inspire you to be you and never be less hard working, less ethical, less punctual, and less driven due to people who are sobbing because it makes them look bad.

The whole "making other people look bad so they can look good" shows their character and lack of care on its own, should they not be inspired to do/be better rather than knocking you down a few pegs? Petty people will always have karma catch up to them. How emotional of me to say that! I know, so unreasonable. Please continue to attempt to destroy my creativity, while I build my dreams despite your bullying tactics. They can't look good via their own skills and competence since they have none... then they wonder why you want nothing to do with their mean-spirited ugly energy (some are ugly on the outside too).

My favourite invertebrate so far is the one who told me to go back to retail so I won’t have to work out as hard in the gym, it’s not “work”, and I have a sit-stand desk. Don’t be pushed around by people like that, they should try bettering themselves for once. Sad souls!

I hope my resilience confuses anyone who carefully put together their “best laid plans” to plot for my downfall. Does it make you feel significant to have to belittle others instead of just bettering yourself? I am not responsible for your insecurities, you are.

Never let them take your Crown, Soul, Spirit and take away the traits that make you who you are. These sad souls have so little going for them that they’d rather take it away from those who do.

The bully’s M.O. is to turn you against yourself so that you do not trust yourself/ instincts/ perceptions, you stop being happy, you stop living your dreams, you stop taking care of yourself/ feeling worthy of carving out unbothered time to recharge, they want you to self-abandon.

They want to occupy your mind/set siege in your mind by controlling you from the perspective of syphoning your soul. Sick little cretins. They clearly lack self-confidence and once again, you're not responsible for dimming yourself down to cater to their insecurities, ever.

The surefire sign of an incomplete life is the desire to one up, compare, judge, condescend, and put down other people. You would think that putting in the work to follow their own dream would take less work than trying to bring someone else who is doing that. It’s weird how they operate.

I spend most my nights in the gym, I am not a partier, I only like a small circle people with the same values (things in common does not cut it for me)... way better for me celebrating nothing with the nobodies who have time to comment on my health budget rather than manage their own? Mind your business.

Keep building your best life while they “Netflix and chill” while eating Hot Cheetos until they 💩 themselves, and act like you’re the insane one for your health budget. Those are not my people! 

Is it just me, or are the people with the least substance (aka empty shells) the most vehement with their envy? It's a blatant lack of self-love, but also not my problem.

For anyone who has ever ganged up against me or tried to pour their misery on me as an individual or gang of beta sheep:

The biggest mistake was trying to bring me down, please maintain your distance and do not come
back, the door is closed, stay out of my life, for good.

Alphas don’t run in packs, nor do we need the approval of people who can’t stand alone and have to run in packs to give off even a mere semblance of confidence.

Back-biters are complimenting you indirectly via their sneak disses and low-key insults as that reveals that they think you're better than them. While you focus on my life instead of yours, I grow my mind-body-soul.

Hope you liked the sass, now carry on to being your best version!

If this post inspired you, you may also like our collection to use as inspiration for your at-home or outdoor workouts! Up your self-care and self-love game and get your goals while the haters hate.