The Power of Stating Boundaries Without Explanation
Setting boundaries is crucial for maintaining mental, emotional, and physical health. While it’s essential to be clear about your boundaries, it’s equally important to understand that you don’t owe anyone an explanation for them—unless they are someone within your social circle or someone you are close to or in a setting where you owe it (clients or work within your scope).
Here's why stating your boundaries without explaining them is empowering and necessary for your well-being.
Boundaries and Self-Preservation:
When you set a boundary, you are prioritizing your well-being. Providing too much information about why you need this boundary can lead to dismissive boundary-hating domineering control-freaks using that information to argue against it. The less information you give, the fewer objections they can raise to undermine your needs for which you're responsible for (you're not pushing your personal responsibilities on others, nor are you infringing on them, you're protecting what belongs to you over which you have full dominion and jurisdiction).
Remember, boundaries are not about pushing away the right people; they are about repelling the wrong ones who are toxic and feel threatened that you have rights and basic needs that are valid. The right people will understand and respect your need for boundaries, encouraging your health and wellness as a priority.
Boundaries Are Essential for Health:
Regardless of how passionate you are about your work or hobbies, rest and self-care are non-negotiable. Everyone needs a certain amount of rest daily to function properly.
This is especially true for people with disabilities, who may require even more rest to maintain their health. There is no level of passion that can replace the fundamental need for rest and recovery. Protecting your time and health is not only your right but also your responsibility. This does not mean balance is 50-50, it means that you choose how much rest you need and you make sure you guard it. There cannot be too many hustle seasons in a row, for instance.
Guarding Your Time and Energy:
The people who truly care about you will respect your boundaries because they understand that nobody else can manage your sleep, nutrition, exercise, and overall physiological well-being for you. Protecting your health means you can show up as your best self in all areas of life (or function at a baseline level with a disability).
Those who challenge your boundaries and demand explanations are often the ones who do not have your best interests at heart. They may be trying to make you an extension of their goals or their agenda at your expense, creating an unhealthy dynamic of codependency.
The Importance of Minimal Explanation:
When you provide a detailed explanation for your boundaries, you give away your power. Keep your statements short and sweet. You do not need to go into long-winded explanations that waste your time and energy. Consideration is mutual—while you should not insult or demean others, you also don’t have to explain your boundaries to them (you are under zero obligation to answer/answer to people who try to control you and you don't owe anyone considering anything you already know doesn't align with your vision, consideration means not being insulting/demeaning - it doesn't mean acquiescing when you should be saying no). Explaining too much can lead to others seeing you as someone they can dominate or manipulate, especially if they have a predatory mindset.
Protecting Your Peace:
Setting and maintaining boundaries helps you filter out the right opportunities and people from the wrong ones. It allows you to process your thoughts and emotions, ensuring that you stay aligned with your true self and goals. Your health comes first, and anyone who has a problem with you protecting your time and well-being is not someone you need in your life.
Guarding your time and energy is crucial for repelling those who try to control or impose themselves on others (if you give them an inch, they take a mile and they are an energy-drain that you can easily live without).
In essence, you do not have to explain your boundaries to anyone outside your close social circle. Stating your boundaries clearly and without explanation helps maintain your power, ensures your health and well-being, and keeps the right people close while repelling the wrong ones. Your health and peace of mind are paramount, and protecting them should always be your top priority.